That was about a year ago. You knew I had been laid off and looking for work in this crap town. I admit, it was my first "real" job working from home for a huge, well known company. I thought it was going to go like any job at a brick and mortar place. Hell, I've been a contractor before - it always went the same way. So when our contract was not renewed after a year, I was blindsided. That's my fault for being naive. I won't be blindsided again - now I know to always prepare for the "just in case", and that hard work and high ratings do not always equal longevity on a job.
But back to you. You knew all of this. I've talked to you on many occasions when coming in to pick up a package or pay the rent. So when I found out that you needed an assistant manager, I knew I definitely had the skills - totally overqualified, but hey, you can't be picky, right? I'll take it. Let me apply.
You, who has pretended to like me, told me I could not. You didn't have a say in the matter, it was the property owner who made that rule. I've learned along the way that when someone immediately blames someone else, they're usually lying about what they've just said. But, I believed you. Just like I believed you liked who I am. Until I started exchanging notes with my next door neighbor and found out things are quite different. Regardless of that, I still wanted the job because I wanted a damn job at all. You like anyone who will listen to you bitch. About everything.
Let's fast forward a year or so to the past week. I came in to report something illegal I had seen go on, and waited on you to end your conversation with a city cop who had come by to discuss yet another neighbor who was up to no good, apparently. I had no idea who you were talking about, but did start chatting with the brand new "daytime" security that you all hired.
Daytime security? When did we get that? I know we've had it for night time, but what the hell is going on that you need it for daytime now? Turns out, daytime security is a temporary thing. Why is that?
Well. I soon found out once I got my opportunity to tell you what I had witnessed. And because the city cop was still there, and you were still in that mind set, it was revealed that the assistant manager that you did hire (instead of me) had been let go, and apparently was causing all kinds of problems because of it.
Oh, and the most interesting part of it all? The assistant manager LIVES HERE!
Well, well, well, what do we have here? Did you forget your lie? Now how is it that the former assistant manager was able to get the job even though they were a tenant, but I can't have the job because I'm a tenant and it would be "a conflict of interest"? Why the need to lie? I mean, if you're going to lie, why not just accept my application and say what every other company says: "We went with someone more qualified." I mean, it's not a difficult job, it doesn't take a lot of brain power. You just have to be well organized, (one of my strongest suits), you have to be efficient (my second strongest suit), and you have to have a good work ethic, (just so happens to be one of my strongest suits, as well.) That's it. You answer the phone, you take notes, you write receipts for rent, you work on a computer and send out notices to those who didn't pay rent, etc. It's not that difficult, so I seriously doubt you could find someone in this area more qualified than I am...over qualified...but at least you could have just said that, like every other company who lies about that.
But you know, I kind of think you did remember your lie. You remembered it just a hair too late, however. I remember that ever so slight look pass across your face - the look that says, "Oh shit, I told her tenants couldn't have this job". I saw it. It was very slight and extremely quick, easy to miss, but you see, another really strong suit of mine is my observation skills. I've scared people with them. People freak out when I get something right with the barest of information. It's actually one of the things that some people don't like about me - that I can read people really, really, really well. And they somehow sense that I can, so yeah, I'm not always popular. People don't like their truths being known.
You couldn't hire me, because I'm a tenant, but you could hire that other person, even though they are a tenant. And right now, you don't know that I know you lied. You don't know that I remember that. You don't think I'm very smart. I'm not as smart as some people, no, but I'm not an idiot, either. And I have a very good memory - especially when I'm told why I can't have a job when I really want a job.
So, you have no idea that I know. I never saw that splash across your face. I'm really good at hiding how I feel. You learn that when you're told, all growing up, not to reveal how you feel, you're just to sit there and smile and be quiet. You learn how to mask things. You learn how to keep any hint of how you feel off of your face. I didn't get to be free with my emotions and feelings when I was growing up.
Nonetheless, I do feel. And now, I can't trust you with anything. I realized I couldn't trust you with much, earlier than this, but now it's confirmed. You "like" anyone who will sit in your office and listen to you trash talk the assistant manager (who, by the way, I never liked - she was very arrogant and mean - I think even a 'lay person' who doesn't pay attention to anything could sense that - yet you hired her after telling me I couldn't have the job because bs), you trash talk tenants in the complex - people I don't even know - you trash talk all kinds of people. Which, of course, duh, means you would trash talk me, as well. And you have. My neighbor told me.
We will have no more sit downs. It's pay the rent, leave. Pick up a package, leave. If I witness anything again, I'll just call it in, tell what I saw, and say I have to get going, but wanted you to know what was going on. There will be no more "chit chats" and "friendly" (laughable) conversations.
There was no reason I couldn't have had that job. I could still be working that job, right now, and you wouldn't be hiring day time security or talking to a city police officer in your office when you could be working.
"Conflict of interest" - indeed.
